What motivates me?

Usually I can think of a 100 things that motivates me, but thinking about it now is like hitting a brick wall. We always need to be motivated to perform certain tasks and sometimes are easier than others, especially depending on the task at hand.

What motivates me at most times is pressure. I need to feel the pressure in order to get things done and please don’t mistake it for a rushed jobs 5 minutes ahead of due, but realistic pressure. I find and have been noted that my best work comes when I’m under pressure, it motivates me to get it done as well as reap the rewards that goes with it when reaching your goal or desired end result.

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The elephant in the room

Confrontation was never my strong point and I doubt that it will ever be. But so many times I find myself or roped in to be the one being squeezed by the elephant in the room. For those who is not familiar with the term it means that everyone present know what they there for but prefer not to talk about the issue because its uncomfortable.

A perfect example in our family is when we had to talk to my eldest daughter about the birds and the bees, this followed by a question she had over dinner. Well we decided to chat about it afterwards also seeing that our little one was still up and about.

While doing the dishes I thought of how I would tackle this one, especially seeing that I’m a firm believer that children when reaching a certain age needs to be informed about certain things. We sat down in the living room and even though we knew what we were there for, we did not say a word. And this was simply because where do you even start?

Okay I could see from dad’s side that he simply there for mere moral support by not be saying a word. We got the message through and she was happy with the feedback and made us feel less un-easy, especially when they say, “we learn this at school” …OMW

If I think back to it now it was very funny, not so much at the time though.

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Every day is a good day

In my house you have the morning people and not the morning people – the morning people being only me that is. No matter what time I got to bed, no matter if I was tossing and turn all night, no matter if I had to see to my sick child during the night not being able to have any shut eye and still go to work the next day – every day is a good day.

Off course we all face different challenges throughout the day but to me if I’m able to leave home in the morning, do what I have set out to do and return to my family in the evening, then every day to me is a good day. And by having a good day it totally rubs off on others and sooner than later things that seemed to be challenging suddenly becomes easier.

I really believe it is a choice we make, being miserable and giving others a hard time is easy but being happy and by deciding to have a great day is a most times a challenge (especially if you have deadlines looming over you). And me, I like a challenge and always up to one, so my choice is to have a good day not matter what comes my way.

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Our greatest strengths are our greatest weaknesses

So often it is seen that when people have a certain amount of power they don’t always use it in the most positive way. My greatest strength is to juggle it all, yet it is also my greatest weakness. Now this is a very admirable position to be in but many times it is to my own disadvantage.  Often I would find myself busy with 10 000 things at once, why, because everyone always knows that I am capable of it because I get it done.

But what they don’t know is how I arrive at the end result; often with slight heart palpitations and a lack of much needed sleep. I blame this totally on my mother who I love to bits. She used to be for a very long time a working mom and see to her family and household without breaking a sweat or an unhappy word. Now I find myself wanting to live up to this legacy and if I don’t do it well and also in record time it’s not good enough. Not because she expects this of me in any way, but because I’ve always known my mother to be able to do anything.  To me it is if my mom could do it so can I. She constantly reminds me that the time and pressures were much different then than now. I can only laugh and nod, but will I listen is another story.

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Try a cliche'

A cliché I tried more than I should is “to pull an all-nighter”. That is all we as students know, especially if you have to juggle work, school and family. It is never easy and you are always in the demand and not the kind of demand we would like to be.

Being a part time student I find myself trying all kind of clichés, but the one mentioned above is one more to common in my life for the last five years and soon one to be over. I am looking forward to just being a mom and a colleague and hey guess what even a friend, as meeting up with friends was only a luxury.

Yes soon my all-time cliché of pulling an all-nighter will be a thing of the past and I am so ready to try a new oneJ

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Feelings follow behaviour

Many times the way we feel when we get up in the morning determines the way our day would be. Not having a great nights rest, or burning the midnight oil can have its toll on you and would show in the day.

Very often when it comes to certain relationships, relationships at work, school or play we often find people or individuals that we click with immediately and often we find the individuals we don’t click with not just immediately but not at all.

I’ve always saw myself being quite an easy going person, I get along with people of all walks of life and very seldom find myself not “getting on” with people along my path. And if it came to that I knew how to keep my distance and also just knew that the problem can’t be with me but with the other person.

I had a colleague once who shared an office space with me, well needless to say that when she started I went in with idea of us being great colleagues as we will be sharing an office but oh boy was I wrong. This colleague and I were like oil and water – struggling to see eye to eye and often I would try and work it out and be just a bit more patient but as soon as that thought came it would go as she would then have found a better way of getting under my skin.

This feeling of I can’t handle her anymore became so strong that it showed in the way I behaved when around her. The office suddenly became too small to host the two of us and with me only seeing the negative side to her did not help me in getting on with my day. Other colleague often asked about this love-hate relationship of ours as the tension was clearly visible. Always trying to keep it professional I would laugh and make as if I have no idea what they were talking about, always thinking I’ll give her another chance. Even though I thought that I am keeping it together the feelings I had towards her showed in my behaviour.

As soon as I realised it I tried harder at least being civil to each other. To my own surprise, I invited her and partner over for dinner and made a point of getting to know the person outside work. Needless to say I had to do it long ago as the understanding between us became much better.

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It’s better to practice a little than talk a lot

Being a mother I often find myself preaching my children. I can just imagine what must be going through their little heads when I start yapping about this and that – awh there she goes again. But often I preach for good reason as I believe that I as a parent am responsible for the type of adults they would be.

I tell myself that I can fail in any other department but I cannot fail raising my children. Sometimes we as parents don’t understand the big responsibility we have on our shoulders when it comes to our children. What we allow and what we don’t allow. I believe that what you put in (the hard work, the love and the commitment) is what you will get out at the end of the day.

We often tell our children you need to do this and need to be that but we turn around and not being either of what we told them. I suppose it boils down to practice what you preach. But sometimes we often preach way too much and forget that we should lead by example. I’ve seen so many times how parent forget so easily what they’ve said and be reminded by the minor. It happens, at the end of the day we also just human and strive for better, but it is better than to lead by example through actions than to speak empty words.

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